26 Jun 2011

Romance is hard

Well I have finally finished my wee entry for the romance competition, and it was harder than I thought.  I initially did my research by reading some romance stories. And I will thank my friend for the loan. I won't identify them here just in case they don't want me to, but I appreciate all your help with this.

I have to say I over estimated myself. Or maybe that's not accurate. I think I just didn't appreciate the brevity that 120 words requires.

I have been told I am a contextual writer. And I see no reason to disagree with this observation.  My first attempt involved me sitting at my desk muttering "romance" over and over to myself. Then I came up with the idea of what would happen if you were the get away driver for a crew of bank robbers, and while you were waiting you met a girl?

Sure ok that has possibilities. So I started writing that.  Around 538 words later I realised I was in trouble. So with great effort I finished with this effort:

“Oi let her go, or you’ll get a slap!” A man’s voice cried out. Katrina and Anton looked over to see a young man marching towards them with intent. Katrina could see the stranger’s dark eyes burning with fury. 

“Look this ain’t your business mate” Anton sneered. To their surprise the stranger kicked Anton hard in the knee. Anton shrieked and crumpled to the ground letting Katrina go as he fell. 

“You hit him?” Katrina said in shock.
“Job done!” The stranger said “I hate bullies!”
“Who are you?” Katrina asked. Suddenly a burglar alarm went off.
“Bollocks! Look are you alright?” the stranger asked urgently.
“I guess?” Katrina said. The Stranger smiled as he ran off.

It's sliced, it's diced and I really wasn't happy with it at all.  But then while commuting to work listening to Adele's new album I had a new idea. And here it is:

As Paul walked in he instantly saw Emma, and he felt his heart pound in his chest.  She looked so cute in a red and black outfit. It highlighted her pretty pale skin and her dazzling green eyes.  She was talking to some tall blonde guy. Paul nervously hovered behind trying to look casual.  The blonde guy moved off. This was his chance. He felt sick with nerves, but with a deep breath he walked up to her. Paul hesitated before speaking.
“Hi.” He said nervously
“Hi, and what can I get you tonight?” Emma asked.
“Umm, a whopper meal please.”
“Anything else?”
Ask her, ask her.
“Umm onions rings?”
“Ok that’s $12.50.” Emma said
“Thanks.” Paul said.

So that is what I sent off today. Thanks to those who gave me advice on this I appreciate it. 


1 comment:

  1. I think the second one fits the criteria of the competition much better. Good luck!!